Friday, January 14, 2011

She's Here!

She's Here!
Hannah Elizabeth Davis
12:34 pm
7lbs 7oz
20.3 inches long

We are SO in love. SO blessed. SO happy. SO overwhelmed.
SO new to this , and learning SO much every day.

Yep, she's been here for 6 weeks. I haven't gotten a chance to sit and really write it all out. Besides, many of you are my friend on facebook and know all about the fact that she's here. To write this all out is going to take some time. I'll probably write it all out in sections between feedings, poos, pees, cuddles, showers, and the occasional meal.

First of all, we had 2 false alarms where we went to the hospital thinking it was time. Both were for contractions. I was definatley having contractions, but they wern't dilating my cervix so I got sent home. Thank goodness though because the first time was at 33 weeks. The second was at 37 though.

Ok so on Mon Nov 29th, I had my 40 week OB appointment and they stripped my membranes. No big deal, they had done this the week  before. I had the same amt of light spotting afterwards with some cramping and contractions that were nothing different then I had been having for weeks. The only thing that was different, was I had a lot more leaking of some fluid. It was yellowish and thick though and my doctor reassured me it was cervical mucus. Yea yea, gross and TMI. O well. So on Weds Dec 1 I had to go to work. I was extremely tired that day even though I had slept just fine that night before. I was going in to work 3-11.  I had A LOT of leaking. More then I had for the last two days. I told Ryan and even showed him. It was a bit thinner, but still yellow and somewhat jello-y. Ryan drove me to work that day because the day before I was so uncomfortable driving.

I got to work, got report, fielded the 500 "you're still pregnant??" questions, and went on my way to see my patients. On my way to see my frist patient, I felt a LARGE amt of leaking all at once. I went to the bathroom prior to going into the patient room and there was A LOT of the yellowy jello-y stuff. Good thing I had a pad.. yea yea...again TMI. I went on to one of my patients room, assesed them, gave them pain medicine, and then WHOOSH! Another gush. Still yellowy, still jello-y. Hmmm. I told a few girls at work who told me to call my OB so I finally did. They insisted I come to the hospital right now. I hung out around work for about another hour and a half while staffing was figured out and Ryan came to get me. He was on his way to class.

We went to the hospital and any and all leaking I had STOPPED. Damn, I was sure I was getting sent home again. The doctors checked me out and said that the fluid most definatley does not look like amniotic fluid. They asked how long I'd been leaking and I told them I wasn't sure because I had been leaking for days and days, but not quite this much. They did the nitrozine test and it came back NEGATIVE.  The dr went ahead and did the Fern test under the microscope and came back with the results. We had already called my mom telling her that we were going to get d/c'd when the doctor said my water was indeed broken and it was time to get ready for a birthday party! It turned out I had a high leak in the amniotic sack. Who knows how long it had been going on. (probably since monday)

right after we found out we were getting admitted
The reason for my yellow jello fluid - meconium. Hmmf.

We were sooooo excited! FINALLY! We called our family, and got transfered to our L&D room. The dr decided to start pitocin to get labor really going since my cervix was only 1 cm. The pitocin really got the contractions going. In fact, my uterus was being extra sensitive and it wasn't taking much pitocin at all to get my contractions only 1 minute apart. The doctors didn't want them that close together so it was a difficult balance the entire time, trying to go between no contractions and contractions every 1 minute.  My parents came to be with us through the labor. It was our plan to have them in the room while Hannah was being delivered. Ryan's mom and dad and grandma came to visit too. My friend Marti came as well and she stayed the whole time even though she had to wait in the waiting room due to their strict visitor policy. After Pit and ctxs for hours and hours, and them breaking a forebag of water that was holding me up, my cervix dilated to 3 cm and I was 90% effaced. Finally, some progress. I was in a huge amount of pain though. The dr agreed to give me my epidural because I did not want to take any narcotic pain meds that would make me forget anything about the experience.

in between ctxs right before epidural
They had a hard time placing the epidural because I had a hard time curling into a ball enough through the ctx that were only 1.5 mins apart. Me, the one who used to help other girls get into the same epidural ball, couldn't do it. The CRNA even said something along the lines of "I've done 14,000 epidurals and never had this much trouble getting one in." Gee thanks Ron. Eventually it went in and I felt WONDERFUL. No more pain. None at all. Aaahh... time to enjoy this experience.

I was super tired and getting a bit anxious and impatient. I was still so scared that something could go wrong. I got to 4 cm, 5 cm, and finally 6 cm. The nurse said things would start moving fast now after 6 cm. Even my own L&D experience agreed with her and I was prepared for things to really start moving.

Right after that my epidural kinda crapped out and I had to get a re dose. After he came in to do the re dose, my nurse sat me up to draw some labs that we had forgotten earlier that needed to be sent with Hannah's cord blood banking kit. Sitting up after an epidural re dose isn't ever a great idea... but I didn't even think about it becaue I was supposed to be the patient, not the nurse. Here I am sitting up when all of the sudden I started feeling pretty crappy. I told the nurse I all the sudden felt like I was going to fall asleep and asked If i coud lay down while she stuck me. She was already mid poke when I asked and she told me to just wait a min while she finished.

That's when everyone else that worked in the L&D department came rushing in. I got laid down and turned on my left side with o2. Pretty  common for a fetal decel that happens when the maternal BP drops from a epidural re-dose. "No big deal, no big deal, no big deal," I kept telling myself. I told myself that right up until my doctor acted worried and I heard someone say "do you wanna take her back" BACK!? Back to a stat c section?? Man being an L&D nurse previously, really sucked right now. Hannah's HR dropped super low and then they were no longer able to trace it. They tried to get internal monitors on Hannah and then those wouldn't pick up her HR either. Someone mentioned something about the machine not working another one said that it was working fine but they couldn't pick up baby. I was freaked out! After what seemed like forever, they finally got Hannah's HR to trace and it came back up. I got some epinepherine and my BP came back up from the 60's to the 90's. Jeeesh.

After all that happened we just waited around for Hannah to make her appearance. Marti came in and out, trading with my parents. Ryan got a short nap, and so did my dad. My mom and I spent hours and hours talking in the dark about what motherhood would be like. I asked her over and over if Hannah would like me when she was born and all kinds of other silly little questions.The nurse kept telling me to sleep. I did feel pretty tired but I just couldn't shut off my thoughts for long enough to actually get some sleep.
The doctors and nurses wern't too concerned about the meconium because it wasn't thick and brown in my fluid, it was just yellowey. However it did mean more people would need to be on hand for her delivery in case she decided to breath in some of her own poo.

Another cervical check-6 cm.
Another one an hr later- still 6 cm.
And another, after another hour-6 cm.
A different nurse, another hour-7 cm. WOO!
Back to the other nurse, another hour later-6 cm (she said the other nurse was wrong)
Another check, another hour-still 6 cm.
(this went on and on)

It had been 26 hours, and no one really knew how long my water had been broken. That means there is a huge risk of infection and things really needed to get moving in order to keep Hannah and I safe.

A call to the dr - a decision was made.

"I spoke with Dr. W. It looks like we are going to go ahead and do a C Section."

Wow... that was not in my birth plan. I was determined to have this baby vaginally and that went right out the window.

(I also didn't want to have any internal monitors and immediate kangaroo care was a must...bye bye to those ideas too.)

There's our plan, and then there is God's plan.

ready for c section

They got me ready and then wheeled me back to the OR. I couldn't believe that we were going to see our much anticipated baby girl very very soon. Even though it had been 26 hours, it all seemed to be going so fast now. They made Ryan wait outside while they got me all prepped and draped. I was terrified of getting the medicine needed into my epidural after what happened last time I got a redose. The CRNA started with a small dose and said we'd go from there. It was weird because I felt numb all the way up to my chest. That caused a lot of anxiety because I didn't feel like I was breathing. The CRNA said it was because my block was so high and it made it so I couldn't feel my chest rise and fall. Weird.

Finally Ryan was allowed back in. He came and sat by my head. I can't believe I was one of those people getting a c section with their husband sitting by their head.

So they started cutting and I immediatley had a lot of pain. The CRNA put more med in the epidural and it still didn't work. It was working really well high up but not so much low down. They decided to give me some IV narcotics and I refused. I felt really strongly about not being too tired or fuzzy headed when Hannah was born. I was already drunken tired. I stuck it out. My doctor let me scream through most of it and that seemed to be a good distraction. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I wasn't numb AT just wasn't the normal amt of numbness that you should have for a c section. They cut and cut and kept saying "2 more minutes."

I had a very irriational feeling right around this time. I was SURE that instead of a baby, I was going to give birth to a watermelon.. If not a watermelon, something equally as weird and large. I was sure there was no way that I was going to be a mother to a tiny living breathing baby. Not me, I wasn't going to be that lucky. I started thinking how weird it would be to tell everyone that we didn't actually have a baby. I don't know what was making my thoughts so  crazy .Perhaps the adreneline. Maybe the lack of sleep. Who knows, but my anxiety level was very high right at that time. (probably didn't help that every pregnancy website compares the size of the baby to some sort of fruit.)

"2 more minutes"
"1 more minutes"
"She's almost here."


Waaaaaahhhh Waaaahhhhh Waaaahhh!

cutting the cord
I can't put into words what her first cries felt like to my heart. My entire life changed in a second. When we heard her we both immediatley started crying. They even did the classic hold her over the drape to see us thing. She was beautiful. She had her arms and fingers spread wide open as if to say "here I am.. please love me." We fell so hard, and so fast in love with her. Head over heels. A love that I didn't even know my heart was capable of.

Ps..she looked nothing like a watermelon.

The doctors said she came out with her eyes open and was crying before her body was even all the way out of me.  She didn't need suctioned and she appeared to have no complications from the meconium. Her apgar scores were 8/9 which are great for a meconium/c section baby. In fact, that's great for a vag baby too.

She went to the warmer and Ryan rushed over to take some pix and video to bring back to me. I could hear her crying and everyone talking about her. I cried and cried and kept saying "Oh my God" over and over and over again. Ryan brought the pictures of her back to me and I couldn't believe my eyes. She was SO absolutley breathtakingly beautiful. I felt so blessed to be her mother.

Ryan got to hold her in the OR and it was so beautiful to watch. He looked so happy and something looked so different about him. I'd never seen him like this before. It was wonderful. They weighed her and she was 7lbs 7oz. She was 20.3 inches long.

The rest of our stay in the OR kinda sucked as far as pain goes. The pain kept getting worse and worse and I didn't want to take any pain meds and be asleep. I think I just felt like I had so little control over everything that had happened in the last 26 hours, but I could control my level of awareness.  I stuck it out and soon we were on our way to recovery.

When we got to the recovery room they immediatley let me have Hannah skin to skin. It was my first time holding her. It was blissful. She was crying and when they laid her on me, she calmed. It felt amazing and so familiar at the same time. So natural. She laid there and I felt her breath on my chest and I cried again. Ryan took pictures and videos. Hannah soon started rooting around and even found her way down to the breast to feed. She did 10 minutes on both sides. The doctor and nurse were impressed. Again more offers for pain medicine. No thank you. We sat in there and enjoyed our time together.

the first time i got to hold her

We called our family and friends who was very excited for us. My mom heard Hannah in the background and cried at the first sounds of her new baby grandaughter. They put Hannah in her basinet and wheeled us to our postpartum room. The nurses did Hannah's first bath in front of us and asessed us both. I just kept looking at her. I was in awe and disbelief. She checked out perfect and they left to give us some family time.

Ryan and I spent a few minutes staring at her,  crying, and loving the moment. After a little bit we invited family in and they ooohed and aaahhhed over her too.

our first family picture. been up for 36 hrs.
We were EXHAUSTED. By then we had been up for 36 hours. Family left after a while and we had more time together just the 3 of us. It was blissful. that night as we slept, I kept opening my eyes to see her laying there to the left of me in her basinett. It was real. She was here, and she was ours.

Her first night
The rest is history. That's about the jist of how it went. We are so happy to have her in our lives. she has us wrapped around her little fingers.


  1. O my gosh, tears pouring as I read. I'm so glad you write it out. Even though I knew most of it there were things I didn't know. LYG!!! And Hannie's!!!

  2. Thanks for sharing and I've already seen her pictures, but she's so cute! :) + she and I share a birthday! xo

  3. BEAUTIFUL STORY! Hannah is just perfect and I can't believe how glowing you were in all your photos! Congrats mama! You deserve a long break from the blog world and to do nothing but be mama to Hannah!

  4. sooo happy for you guys! she is beautiful!

  5. Megan I am weeping tears of joy for you...congratulations mama, Hannah is gorgeous! If I could have one wish in this world it would be for every babylost mama to have their rainbow and I am so happy you've gotten yours. Much love to you both <3

  6. Congratulations!! She is gorgeous. Hope you are all doing well.